happy thoughts, I have them!

So I am trying to be more positive or at least be less of an over flowing volcano of spite and hate. Guess what it is not going well! I also have a couple of boxes of pictures/cards/crap I've accumulated over the years that I can't seem to throw away no matter how hard I try and have been thinking about scrapbooking (???????) that bullshit. (are you fucking kidding me?) I have no idea how to scrapbook and 5 google searches later I am no closer to even having a single clue on how to start. One of the websites I found while surfing ye olde net had an entire section dedicated to paper. Apparently you can't just use regular paper you need to get the kind that has designs on it. Like flowers or sunsets or teacups or ohmygod what am I even doing?

Look at this shit. I guess that elephant is pretty cute but why is it's trunk so long? Also what is the point of having patterned paper when I'm going to be gluing cards and concert ticket stubs I attended when I actually left the house on a somewhat regular basis, won't the little guys just get covered up? I am not a fiscal genius but I don't think paying 7.95 for 12 sheets of specialty paper is worth it if you can only see like 25% of it.

But really, the funniest (saddest?) part of this whole pipe dream is the idea that anything about my life is worth preserving. No one comes over to my apartment so who is even going to see it? Does that mean I would have to bring my shoddily put together ~*book of presh memories*~ to one of 6 social outings I do per year? The only upside is that would probably prevent me from getting any future invitations to really anything. See? Positive thinking!

You know, the current background of my blog (haha, why do I even do things like this?) looks like it would be scrapbook acceptable. I'm sure there are more templates that would be more my "style" (solid grey or black b/c g0th) but I am nothing if not lazy and this was one of 7 styles that popped up when I selected to create a new blog. Also I am old and I don't have to justify my decisions to you. Maybe I will change it to something more my style (solid grey or black b/c g0th) if I don't delete this in the next 6 months. I have a long and proud history of writing slop on the www, being filled with abject horror upon re-reading it, and then 86ing it out of embarrassment of who I am as a person. But who knows, maybe since every pore of mine is going to be oozing with positive mf thinking it will stick around.